In celebration of International Women’s Day, we’re shining a light on the issues women face at work and exploring how to support women in the workplace. New data suggests that women continue to make important gains in workplace representation, especially in senior leadership. However, women are now almost twice as likely as their male colleagues to report feeling burned out due to the added stress they have taken on at work and home.
So, how can we empower more women to thrive at work this year?
“The ability to thrive at work – even amid disruption – depends on a complicated web of social connections that shape our wellbeing habits, attitudes, and actions as we go about our jobs,” explains Dr. Aaron Jarden from The University of Melbourne’s Center for Wellbeing Science. “This means that when it comes to caring for mental health and wellbeing and addressing the potential causes of burnout, we need strategies that address the ‘Me’ (individual), ‘We’ (leaders and teams), and ‘Us’ (workplace) needs of women in organizations. It requires a systems approach.”
The good news is that tiny, evidence-based nudges at the Me, We, and Us levels can have a big impact. Especially when it comes to learning how to support women in the workplace.
“ Simply normalizing – for ourselves and others – that our experiences of stress and struggle at work are nothing to feel anxious, ashamed, or dismayed about can significantly lower our risk of burning out.”
‘Me’ Level – Normalizing Stress, Struggle and Self-Doubt
Unfortunately, far too many women still go to work worried that today will be the day they are discovered to be the imposters they fear they are. Yet, studies continue to find that experiences of stress and struggle at work are not only normal, but healthy opportunities for learning and growth.
Simply normalizing – for ourselves and others – that our experiences of stress and struggle at work are nothing to feel anxious, ashamed, or dismayed about can significantly lower our risk of burning out. By understanding that these uncomfortable and, at times, painful feelings are not a sign that we are broken. Rather, they are an opportunity (albeit an unwanted one) for learning and growth.
Moments of stress and struggle often feel overwhelming because they are our body’s way of trying to get our attention. Our body is trying to alert us to the fact that something important to us is on the line. Rather than ignoring or numbing these feelings, Dr. Alia Crum at Stanford University has found that stress and struggle can have many positive benefits for us when we:
- Acknowledge that we’re feeling stressed or that we’re struggling.
- Welcome these uncomfortable feelings by recognizing they are a response to something we care about.
- Use the extra charge of energy and focus that come from these feelings to try and create the outcomes we want.
“ Offer our support when we can see someone is struggling through an opportunity for learning and growth, rather than biting our tongue or just fixing it for them.”
‘We’ Level – Building Psychological Safety
Women now report that “dealing with others at work” has become their biggest struggle when it comes to caring for their wellbeing. Perhaps this isn’t surprising given that studies suggest women are doing more to support their teams and advance diversity, equity, and inclusion efforts. So, how can we better share the relationship load with other leaders and team members?
The challenge we face is that our brains are wired to protect us from any source of threat. And in most workplaces, other people’s biases, fears, and expectations are what keep us on edge. To keep ourselves safe, our brains tend to leap into mind-reading mode. They try to help us judge what other people might be thinking, feeling, and doing and the risks that may pose.
As a result, when it comes to our relationships with others, we all tend to rush to unfavorable conclusions. We bite our tongues while seething with resentment, moan and groan to other colleagues, and blame and shame when we feel threatened. While these judgmental behaviors soothe our fearful brains in the short term, long-term studies have found they lead to distrust, spotty implementation, an inability to learn together, and higher levels of anxiety and burnout.
The antidote? Dr. Brené Brown suggests choosing courage over comfort and generosity over judgment. For example, we can all:
- Slow down and ask questions, rather than rushing to mind-reading.
- Offer our support when we can see someone is struggling through an opportunity for learning and growth, rather than biting our tongue or just fixing it for them.
- Dare to have conversations that are clear and kind and that support people’s accountability, rather than moaning and groaning about them to other colleagues.
- Sit with our shared responsibilities when things don’t go to plan, rather than blaming and shaming each other.
“To avoid burning women out, workplaces need to invest in building cultures of care and making these behaviors everyone’s responsibility.”
‘Us’ Level – Creating Cultures of Care
Researchers note that when workplaces prioritize diversity, equity, and inclusion and support wellbeing, employees are happier, less burned out, and less likely to consider leaving their jobs. Compared to their male colleagues in similar positions, studies have found that over the last year, more women have been consistently taking action to support their people’s wellbeing and be active allies, even though their work often goes unrecognized and unrewarded.
To avoid burning women out, Dr. Paige Williams from The Leaders Lab suggests that workplaces need to invest in building cultures of care and making these behaviors everyone’s responsibility. For example, workplaces that have a culture of care supercharge DEI, wellbeing, and performance by frequently prioritizing:
- Compassion – They recognize and reward people for reaching for curiosity and generosity, rather than leaping to assumptions and rushing to judgments about people. This creates psychologically safe spaces for learning and allyship.
- Appreciation – They value asking for and giving help, so they can harness their individual and collective strengths and reduce wasted time and effort.
- Responsibility – They invite ownership, clarify commitments, and hold people accountable instead of indulging incompetence, settling for half-hearted compliance, or looking the other way when boundaries and values are crossed.
- Emotional Wisdom – They view emotions – even the uncomfortable ones – as ‘information’ to be understood, so they can embrace the reality that both feelings of thriving and struggle fuel resilience and support growth.
Of course, as simple, practical, and affordable as these approaches to help women thrive are, it doesn’t mean that is easy to stick with. Otherwise, we’d all be doing it already and that is not the case. Never ‘won-and-done,’ these practices require small daily commitments. They also require the willingness to keep asking what’s working well, where are we struggling, what are we learning. And based on this, what will we try next?
So, what will you try next as you learn how to support women in the workplace?
Are you looking to raise awareness and make wellness a priority at your organization? LifeSpeak Mental Health and Resilience can help your members better understand key issues that affect mental health and take positive action through on-demand, expert resources, tools, and microlearnings. To learn more about our full suite of solutions, request a demo today.
About the Author, LifeSpeak Inc. expert Dr. Michelle McQuaid 
Dr. Michelle McQuaid is a best-selling author, workplace wellbeing teacher, and playful change activator. With more than a decade of senior leadership experience in large organizations around the world, she’s passionate about translating cutting-edge research from wellbeing, positive psychology, and neuroscience into practical strategies for health, happiness, and workplace success.
An honorary fellow at Melbourne University’s Centre for Wellbeing Science, she blogs for Psychology Today, hosts the top-rated weekly podcast Making Positive Psychology Work, and her work has been featured in Forbes, the Harvard Business Review, the Wall Street Journal, Boss Magazine, The Age and more.